A lot of the “self help” you run into in your search for stability, authenticity or inner peace amounts to a sort of treadmill. We find ourselves jumping from one treadmill to another, over and over again. New diet, new mate, new exercise program, new motivational / self image / spiritual seminar / audio / book… ad infinitum. It’s a universal quest to feel better than we do now.
I did that for a long time. Then I realized I was getting nowhere no matter what the treadmill looked like. After which I realized that real change / transformation / healing is more like swimming in the ocean where the waves and swells and currents are pulling at you and tossing you about. .. with one other thing: You have to be able to be OK with it.
OK with what? Wondering if you really are going anywhere, but not letting that throw you. Allowing the massive forces to push and pull you without really resisting, but still moving on. Being more devoted to discovering what is real or true than you are to avoiding what hurts. In fact the only thing that really works is moving toward and processing everything that hurts / upsets / irritates you. This amounts to emotional integration.
Get off the treadmill and jump into the ocean of deep feeling awareness.